Feel Guilty for Thinking About Your Own Needs?


Putting yourself first can make you feel out of your comfort zone when you are a busy mum. You feel guilty for even thinking about your own needs.

The external and internal pressures coming from social-media as well as high expectations from family, well-meaning friends, other mothers, and our own self imposed pressure.

It is possible to have a more balanced life, you just have to look at where you can find the opportunities where you can meet your own needs. Simpler said than done, eh!?

Do you find yourself saying; “My to do list is so long”, “I can’t possibly fit it in.", “But I don’t have time”, “I’m too busy”, “I’m too tired”, “I just want to binge watch a Netflix series with a big chocolate bar and glass (bucket) of wine”. I totally get you, this struggle is real!

“One of the happiest moments in life is when you find the courage to let go of what you cannot change.”

-- Unknown author

Being a busy mum myself to two young boys, a dog and cat, my to do list is long, doesn’t seem to go down that quickly and is always getting longer. I started to make some small changes in my life to gain some much needed ‘me time’:

  • Not staying up too late watching TV box sets and going to bed one hour earlier meant that I get up bit earlier in the morning. I feel a bit more organised and not as rushed for the school run.
  • Stopping some of the takeaways we were getting during the month and using that money to pay for a cleaner a couple of hours a week.
  • Putting my youngest into a few more hours in childcare at least once a month.

They weren’t massive changes but it gave me back some ‘me time’. I’m meeting the needs of my family so much better. I’m finding I’m happier and lighter because of it.

There’s nothing wrong with a bit of TV and the odd time a bucket of wine. I myself like to partake in this but if it’s becoming a nightly habit then it probably isn’t serving a useful purpose, even possibly becoming detrimental to your physical and emotional health.

There must be something else that fills your heart with more joy that you could be doing which is a more healthier way to wind down.

Imagine how much time you could free up if you set yourself a limited daily time to check social media or reduce TV time and not self medicate at the end of the day with wine or chocolate.

Here are a few suggestions with your new found ‘Me Time’.

  • Listen to my free ‘Unwind and relax after your busy day’ MP3. Find out more
  • Have a long soak in a bath. I love sprinkling epsom salts and essential oils in mine with a few candles dotted about - Bliss!
  • Read a magazine or book
  • Listen to an inspirational podcast
  • Listen to your favourite music
  • Plan a coffee/lunch date with a friend
  • Get on the phone and have a chat to someone you’ve not spoken to for a while
  • Take a walk
  • Write a thank you note.
  • Be creative and write in a journal
  • Go to an exercise class, or do some yoga.
  • Go for a run
  • Dance around your living room to some of your favourite 90’s tunes (no-one is watching!)

There is so much you can do which will boost your happy hormones (endorphins) and empty your full bucket. What would you do with this extra time?

Click here to find out all about my free ‘Unwind and relax after your busy day’ MP3 .

Love Samantha x